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I want to feel better… and soon

A common thread among people who struggle with mental health, parents / loved ones and care providers is that we often want to see quick solutions. ⁠

We all feel this way

As clients, we want to feel better quickly, and don’t feel the depression or struggle in our heads. In the beginning we hope that care providers can explain everything to us and that our symptoms will quickly diminish within a short period. ⁠ Parents & loved ones especially want us to be happy. They are worried and sometimes want to go back to the period where we felt good or find a miracle cure so that we immediately no longer suffer. Many social workers have all learned fantastic things at school and often know that the solution is not fast, and yet they hope (very human) that results will be quickly so that they know that what they use is the right choice.

There is no quick fix

What we sometimes forget is that for us getting to the point where we are now with our mental shizzle, it has generally taken years and years to come to this point. Certain beliefs and emotions (or no emotions) have become part of who we are and how we survive in this world. Unlearning this takes energy and requires a lot of time and attention. It is hard work and in the long term it is well worth it … only in the short term it can be very frustrating. ⁠ We also often focus on very large goals. Sometimes parents / relatives & social workers think that they already made a goal very small, only this still turns out to be a big goal for us. So you also have to break the “small” goal into even smaller steps. If you are depressed, getting out of bed for 10 minutes can be the win of the day. You can make a nice daily schedule, but if this is still too much to ask, it will work against you. ⁠

Work on your own pace

Consider for yourself whether a goal that you set for yourself, but also that your parents / loved ones or social workers set with you, is the right one. Can you handle it? Or does it feel too big? No matter how strange we think it is to trust our gut … it knows what’s good.

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